There ain’t much I’m scared of. I mean, hold up- let me re-phrase that. There ain’t much I’m scared of that I can control in my life. But what scares me the most is the future… Why? You ask?! (sif you wouldn’t ask! ;)) Well, If ya know me by now- I’m a bona fide freak of control! I need to know what’s gonna happen, what’s going on and the point by point info of how it will effect my life. Call this selfish as you will, but I deem it necessary to tell the story of my future life. As I welcome the year 2015, I start to look to my fears as stories and tell them in the form of resolutions. It’s all about a visual peoples!
For example, not knowing if my son’s 4 day tanty is a growth spurt or if he is permanently wired this way scares the shit outta me! So you see, fear gets the better of all of us. It’s fair to say that we imagine the worst fears, most of the time. It’s a sort of an unintentional storytelling. In my mind, I regurgitate them over and over again. There are characters. There are plots. There is imagery and suspense. It’s all about what will happen next. Dun-dun-duuuunnnnnnn!!! (Cue JAWS film score)
So by translating my fears into these fictional fantasies, I feel like I can project myself forward in time and get a good firm grip on it! I see myself as the author- like a pick your own adventure kinda thing (Ugh! I did think those books were super uncomfortable to read, right?). How we choose to read and tell these fears/stories can have a profound effect on our lives.
Anywho, back to new years resolutions… I ain’t a big believer in them. As humans, the part of the brain that holds the willpower required to follow through with a NYR is actually like a muscle and giving yourself 5 million resolutions with no real goal set or plan to manage them is like lifting a 300kg barbell with no previous weight training. Right? You getting the visual? Set. Up. To. Fail!
Instead of giving myself resolutions, which I freak out that I won’t manage anyway, I imagine how my life in the year will flow. Like a piece of fiction! It has characters (me and the people in my life), a plot (what happens-usually defined by the hairdressing calendar and now the monthly milestones of my baybee), the suspense (will my hard work have paid off? Will I be holding the trophy? Is he still a happy, healthy human?).
I reckon at this stage it’s pretty damn simple, really- it’s about being happy and worrying about what I CAN control. If you want to change something- do it now, not at the start of a month, year or day. If there’s anything I’ve learnt about being a mamma its ‘take it a day at a time’. Live in the moment but always have a story to tell.
Hello 2015… please be gentle,
Love Maria xxx